Nerves

Status: Thoughful
Song: Gamba de Legn- Ciapasala no

Hi everyone, I have decided to write again, I have only the English exams, on Monday and Thursday, but now I have much more time because I don't have lessons. The Chinese exams have gone ok, although the day of the oral exam I met the director of studies (who is a little bit teasing, and as I said sometimes, he taught me...) And he asked me if I was making such a racket upstairs (Oh, of course, you ask it to somebody who is really quiet...:D)

During this days I felt a little sad because I don't know anything about the job. I tried to call and... no answer. And there is a month to go. Obviously, this fact upset me. To tell the truth, I was starting to think in staying at home, but I realised that I absolutely have to go. Whatever happens. Deep down, the most seriously thing that could happen is to have the need of going to the Spanish consulate and ask for a return ticket, But I hope not to reach that limit...

Nevertheless, during last weeks I have had a kind of virtual love at first sight with a boy from Milan, the strangest thing is that it seems to be mutual.... He has impressed myself a lot really, and it seems that I impressed him too. By the way, independiently of this, he looks surprised because he says I look really involved with politics... To tell the truth I have been interested in that for some years... My ideas had been always more or less the same... More or less. The most curious thing is that regarding Italy, some people really convinced of their ideas have done that I could know some people (virtually at last) of the politics world. Some majors, dipolomate ranks and candidates. o_O

At least, I has been called from the ONCE for a Braille course. They really have the obbligation of organize courses, but there are not many volonteers at Vigo, so they organise this course sometimes :D

Shit

State: depress
Song: Pesi Piuma- Giorni di Sangue

Today I'm not fine. Menstrual, angry because my brothers have travelled for first time (to Paris) and I had gone to any place out of Galicia. They have just only 15 years old, and they have been to Madrid, to Barcelona, and now to Paris.

I don't have clear ideas either about my return to Italy, it could be a big victory or a spectacular failure. In these days I have no news about the job, they have to send me a document to sign yet... About "where to sleep" I don't have either anything clear, I'm thinking about some possibilities, but I don't know anything for sure.

Today is the tipical shit day in which I only want to cry and eat. In this period I don't go out, everybody are busy... I don't know. I'm not fine. And in a short period of time, I will have exams...

I'm not sure about my future... Absolutely not..

Musical Experiment

I could never imagine the thing I have done now.

I was listening a song of the Modena City Ramblers, an Italian group who makes celtic music, they are inspired by the Irish music, and sing in Italian and in Modena dialect.

Well, I was listening one of their songs,"La Fiola Dal Paisan", And I don't know why... Suddenly, I have taken my tambourine. I take easily the rithim of the song. And I have playing with my tambourine while I sang a part in Italian, and a part in Modena dialect.

I haven `t been making experiments for a long time...

Men...

I have a big mix-up in my mind..

I have a lot of men in my mind... And I don0t know if I'm important to someone...

Probably I'm not nothing to some of then. Or an admirer. Or a friend. But no-one will dream with me...

I'm listening a song that predicts the tragedy...

Bad weekend

This weekend wasn't the best:

- Fights at Friday night
- Melancholy at Saturday night
- Wishes of realize an impossible dream
- Jelousy at Sunday.

Week without internet

Hi to everybody, that 5 days I was almost everytime disconnected, only I had seen the mails (to avoid the saturation...) I felt good, and I realized my objective: To finish to read Italiani si diventa I was concentrated in my homework.

Then, in my free time, I was listening music, most of the time, Gli Atroci I Gem Boy Babaman and Morodo . Obviously Gli Atroci and I Gem Boy were useful when I wasn't well, to laugh a little, and to charge me with a lot of... energy! (boooom!) and about, Babaman and Morodo (The only Spanish group I have listened in this period) to get relax. I ask me what could think my parents when I turned on music of Gli Atroci or Gem Boy. ( It's better not to think about) (Now I'm listening with my aural of the ears,Gli Atroci not to listen the thing that my mother is listening, that sicks me, (Luis Miguel) I have to say too, that when yesterday I was waiting to enter to my English class, I was singing Canzone del cazzo and I didn't mind if people listened to me... I ask me for the effect if I would sing it first of enter to my Italian class... (I hope that teachers never will listen me singing a GB's song... What would they say???)

I had wrote a lot, (another objective) I had write a letter for Milan too (I ask me how many time needs to arrive to Italy....) I started to write a story too about a Spanish man who goes to know an Italian girl who has the half age... I feel inspirated for tue moment (Whithout comments!) And I have concentred in religion too.

I had take some coffee with some partner. That's a direct message to people who say that I'm not sociable. I'm knowing a lot of people. If today I pass the final test vs. my shyness, I will can to pass everything :D

A little about everything

Hi to everybody!

Today, Although there's a sad new about yersterday that I wont say, it was a beautiful, happy day and full of news...

Raf have maken a description in his blog with a lot of fiability, although he did it in Italian, obviously.

Yesterday morning I recieved an email of a music group who is looking for a female singer... The problem is that I would have to go to Pontevedra.. Although if everything goes all right, I'll look for a person to go. Then I went to the library to take the first Italian book for reading.

I made teathre in Italian and somebody had to write an argument on the phone, at her home. Then we had to play it. I made a lot of stress, and my teacher said... "You had a lot of discussions, didn't you?" And I answer: "Yes, and a most of this with Italian people!" (Worst and unpolite too)

Then, I had Italian lesson. At lesson, Ele and me, laugh a lot because she taked a book about the state of my "virtual ex", Abruzzo, and that book talk a lot about dialects and that things.. We laughed trying reading and understanding the dialect of two boys who made jokes... (I discoverd I understand more than in that moment)

When the lesson had finised, I asked to my teacher the book that he writed and he writes: "For Anahí, from writer to writer. With simpathy, Fabio". Beautiful! Then he told me that he read me in a site on internet where I published something. I couldn't imagine!

Later, Elena and me, went for a walk while we waited for Patry, a childhood friend, who studies there too, and lives near to Elena. For this reason, they leave togheter.

I'm awful

Hi to everybody,

I'm awful from yesderday.

That's the second time, the plans go to hell again. I feel powerless seeing as everything is out of control, and I can't do nothing to get a solution for my problems.

Emocionally, I'm worst everyday, It couldn't be another way.

Is not right...Everything is going bad and now I'm destroied.

Today is 7 th November

Today is 7th November.

Today, just one year ago, I was destroied. My red eyes, full of tears, couldn't stop crying. I thank: " I'll never return to be happy" I didn't find sense to something, and I thank the world finished. Just one year later, everything is different.

The Anahí of today is different. She doesn't feel bitterness to the causing of the tears, because I wasn't exactly the true causing. The Anahí of today, look to life more positively her life and look her whishes closer. She is calm. She's happy of to be absolutely single. She dances, sings, writes, laughs, goes out with friends. She get progress in the school. She is happy.