Samil

Ondas do mar de Vigo,
se vistes meu amigo!
e ai Deus, se verrá cedo!

Ondas do mar levado,
se vistes meu amado!
e ai Deus, se verrá cedo!

Se vistes meu amigo,
o por que eu sospiro!
e ai Deus, se verrá cedo!

Se vistes meu amado
por que ei gram cuidado!
e ai Deus, se verrá cedo!



I open this post with acantiga de amigo, reallyimportant in the Galician culture, to reflect the importance that the sea has for us. And it is because yesterday I went for the second time to Samil's beach this year. It is curious, is a beach that, in the fund, is not significant for me: My parents always has taken me to Patos, and my grandmother, to America beach.Nevertheless, it is the one that is best communicated.





It was hot, in fact I have been burned. When I came to the beach, I could walk placidly along the waters of the Atlantic Ocean. Without thinking about anything. I believe that it is one of the things that would miss if some day me was to Milan. Actually it would miss out wherever I would go, so the Atlantic Ocean, in the coasts of Galicia, would say that is unique.

I was entering more and more inside the water. I remembered something that it happened some time ago. One of my uncles had a Cuban girlfriend, and the first time that went to a beach of Galicia, my cousin and I were with them. We two, ran towards the water like mad, and she ran behind... It was clear that when she entered inside, she trembled with cold...




Yesterday while I was lunching, a gull took to itself part of my sandwich... These things before were not happening either, certainly, they go with the times...

The sea has been very important also in the culture and Galician witchcraft. Have you heard speaking about the ritual of nine waves? It is for girls who want to remain pregnant women, and it was consisting of entering the water full moon, and of being left to throb for nine waves.

Yesterday I passed a lot of time in the beach, it is the motive which I burned, and also the motive for which later I was lacking the time...

I hope everything will go well...

I know, I don't draw well...

I have found something curious...

A little "map" I drow when I was in a hotel in Milan last days... after losing myself!



To people who don't know: the circle is Piazza Piola.

Third time lucky

I'm happy, because this time, my third time in Madrid has been different, although we have to sleep some hours in the car...

I have enjoyed myself. I went with Adrián and Salomé, and then of many hours and many stops in many petrol stations, (Going out of Galicia, cross into Ourense and ho through is not an easy thing...) we arrived to Madrid. We went to Atocha's station. Then we headed the city, specially in the Gran Vía street, beause I had to buy a dress to Marta's wedding, it will be in a couple of months. We caught a bus because Salomé had to do an exam in the European University of Madrid, so Adrián and me took something until she went out of there. There is something which called my attention; interprovincial buses belong to the civil service there, here at Vigo, buses haven't nothing to do with the civil service, at least, as I know.

When Salomé comes, we went to eat in a vegetarian restaurant, (Fres.Co ) which by my point of view it is a paradise! It is a kind of self service and all-you-can-eat restaurant. So you eat what you want and in the quantity you want. It is fantastic! I want a restaurant like that in Vigo!

I think is not necessary to say that we made as well two stops in the Starbucks... another luxury that we don't have here... (grrr!)

Another curious thing is that Madrid was full of Italians, maybe by this reason and because I wanted to give a hand to Salomé (she has finished 2º) we talked in Italian some time. On top of that, I dressed my Italy's wristband, so show-off, ha, ha, ha.

It was a small pleasure to me as well, catching the underground, it is one of that things I haven't do in a year. I love going down, feeling that big air gust while the underground doesn't stop, and rush myself towards the door. That is, moving on Italians, one of the times we entered in the underground, a man which dressed a suit, and who I had heard first talking in Italian by the phone, made me a question and then he answered to himself (better like that, because I don't really know Madrid...) When we came into the underground, he was there yet, and Salomé was asking me doubts of Italian language! I explain them to her, I did some comment about the Milan's language as well, (it couldn't miss) and the sir was looking at us with curiosity... I was trying holding back my wishes of laugh...

We went to some drinks at night with an Adrián's friend, so, he and Salomé was talking about the exam and things connected to that. I was a little sleepy, my eyes closed theirselves... Finally, when we said goodbye to him, I tried to sleep a little. But things didn't go well at all. Adrián, ate and drank too much in a petrol station and he hasn't in good conditions to drive. So, we stoped at Castilla y León, finally we had to stay to sleep at a hostal that they had there. Everybody was better in the morning, then of took a little breakfast, we continued with the coming way, lurching and making a lot of stops. We arrived at Vigo on 16.00. I learnt that the motorway to go is the A52 and that is better to be keeping an eye if you don't want to lurch...

Qualifications!

I'm happy.

I have passed all the languages. It means two things: I will be a calm summer, and I could organize myself to returno... The fact is I don't know yet what I'm going to do in my life (Specially because there are many informations which I don't know where to find them)

A new chapter?

Maybe.

Maybe I would have to close a chapter in my life.

Maybe la Viga has to die. And I will be Anahí again. So, the buddist profecy could be real.

Sex and frivolousness

If I have to be sincere, I don't understand that.

I don't understand to people who goes to "have a screw", just without any reason, only to to let off steams, or to let off their daily frustrations. It is absolutely ridiculous. But sex is that to many people: A relief. An energy discharge.

I don't understand to people who says: "Ok, I have fucked somebody else" and he or she feels happy. Sex is not that. Sex is an holy union, by my point of view. There isn't a biggest concept of union in the fisical world. The frivolousness maybe happens because of many reasons, for instance, some media and the hole society, which looks to sex as a manipulation element.

By another point of view, I think nowadays, a woman has to be coscient to know who is going with. Going with anybody to make sex could be really dangerous. Althought they must take responsabilities, usually they don't.

So, why this frivolousness with a topic which means a lot of responsabilities?

Private TV... You are so young...

I laugh if I think that when I have borned there were only 3 TV channels: The Public Tv La Primera opened in 1956, and la 2 in 1965) and the regional Tv, the TVG, which have started its broadcastings in 1985.

In 1990, (When I was 3 or four years old) to invite tenders to have a TV licence. The winners were Canal +, Antena 3 and Telecinco.

Antena 3 was the first, because its regular broadcastings started on 25th of January of 1990, being the firstprivate channel to broadcast to all the country. It is part of the Antena 3 group withOnda Cero, Europa FM, Movierecord, Atres Advertising A3Multimedia, and Unipublic. It was the introduction of Antena3...

Canal + had an special awarding, It had to broadcast obbligatory 6 hours in open transmition, but it could trasmit the rest of programmes as codificated programmes. It started at 8th of June of 1990 with its test broadcastings, and in the 14th of September, its regular ones. (Who don't remember the Canal + tune???)

I have gave to the last to Telecinco, because, There were something fishy going on rather. Telecinco was the second to broadcast, on 3th March of 1990, with almost all the Italian staff and a big show, based in the television format of Canale 5.

There are two curious data which are important to stand out. Firstly, the German and French versions of Canale 5 didn't share the same luck as Telecinco. Telefünf opened in 1988 and closed in 1992. Finally, in 2002, the Tele München Gruppe opened it again. I don't know really the reasons of these changes, because the most part of the information is writing in German... And I don't understand it.

La Cinq, on the other hand, didn't have good luck. It borned in the 1986 and died on 1992, broadcasting in drect, because although most of the programmes had a good sharing of audience, the channel registered losts, and finally, it declared its tecnic bankruptcy. The debt was of a million of Francs, so, they let it die on 12th of April of 1992.

A last curious thing about Telecinco, the Spanish channel, that it is alive, and in fact, is the channel which has more success from two years ago.In 1989, Fininvest had the 25% of the channel, however, since its start in the stock exchange 2004 Mediaset Investimenti have a chilling percentage of the benefits of this channel: ¡¡¡50,13%!!! (Whitout comments,isn't it??)

Nowadays, television grows unstoppable.In 2005, borned Cuatro and in 2006, la Sexta. It arises me a question: Were we happiest when there were only three tv channels, in stead of all that channels that we can have now from the digital plataforms?

I have passed Chinese!

I have passed Chinese (or better, the teacher passed to everybody...)

I have a 6,6 in the listening, a 6 in the writing (grammar) and a 8 in the oral. (I don't know if next years they will make us do a writing comprenhension or a writing exam, but this year they didn't) There is to take in account that now, with the new rules, a 6 is "pass" and a 5 "fail" , so, it influences me in Chinese and English, but not in Italian, as I'm doing 5º and it has the old plan yet.

So, there is something that it has finished... Next week I will know what happened with English and Italian.

Speaking of that, I don't know what to do in my life. There is a FP (profesionistic formation, I don't know really which is the equivalence) but is an higher grade, and to do that, I have to do a Bacherellor for adults...I will go to ask, but It make me feels a little... I don't know :D

pizzica pizzica

I have just seen now that the Italian departament has pubblished the complete video of the pizzica pizzica...

Enjoy it :D

Perhaps... :(

It only ocurred me to sing to the Madonina although I'm not a christian...

Oh mia bèla madonina,
che te brillet de lontan,
tutta d'or e piscinnina,
tì te dominet Milàn....

Si, vegnì senza paura,
num ve slongaremm la man,
tutt el mond l'è on grand paes a semm d'accord
ma Milàn l'è on gran Milàn!

I MISS YOU!

I wait until tomorrow...

I kid myself.

I kid myself thinking it will be a tomorrow. Tomorrow I could breath, tomorroy I could scape. Tomorrow I could look through your eyes, and tell you what I really think. If you are in that tomorrow yet, I will be there.

Another time the "morriña". The morriña, in Galician, is the homesickness. The homesickness which is destroying myself inside and outside of me. Thoughts, lost throught the clouds of my head. Indescriptible anxiety which break my soul too. I don't breath. I can't breath. I must to pass these exams. I must to be free and be calm on September. I have to return.

And we will be again, then of discussions, tears, and a strange plot of love stories, hateness and sex. And we will hug ourselves, while cars shout, people look us with a mixture of hateness and envy, and tram cars move without piety. At the same time, I will look around myself, remembering old memories, and, I will smile, with tears in my eyes.

Tears go down my eyes each time I remember that hug. And I cry when I remember me rounding in the Milan streets, hoping the tomorrow never would come.

But it arrived. And now I'm here, in Vigo, thinking I'm happy about being Galician at the end. Vigo, the city of Olives. Tree of the peace, the fertility, the victory and the reward. But I don't have internal peace, I have to won my victory, and the reward would be the result. Waiting yet. Dreaming yet. An. And.

I'm only a phantom of the past...?

Incredible...

And it has finished...

And official lessons have finished. Now is the turn of exams. The English and Chinese lessons have finished in a regular way, but not the Italian ones.

At the Italian classes we never had a united group, but two groups. Today the evidences exploted. The revolted band went to the café to cellebrate a course's ending, hypocritical and clandestinelest. However, the symphatizers of the "captain" Fabio, stayed in class, in a respect and educated way, paying attention to his last explanations.

Tensions in that class were evidents, but this last times, tension was really hard. There was only a timetable to Italian, with hens and owls. Almost everybody, women, and the hipocrisy was obvious. The hipocrisy's play has been obligatory during the course. If not, you could be uncorrectly seen.

And now it has finished, almost the ship hasn't arrived to a safe port. I think that every soldier could obey to his captain, or at least respect him, but I could see that not everybody thinks like me.

Destination: Subitam Vel Repentinam Mutationem

Yesterday I defeated.

I went to work, as all days, but I knew that It already will be not the same. They have made us to do client service. I have gone, again, with my mp3 in my ears. I entered, I sat, I started to work, and then they make us go there. It was horrible.

Then on some calls, which I deal, the crisis arrived. It calls an angry person. I couldn't do everything. I didn't found the information. People didn't notice that I needed some help. I was, at least, fifteen minutes like that. I couldn't deal with all the pression of doing everything at the same time. I crumbled. I couldn't take breath, I couldn't evite crying as a stupid one, the hands shaked. I wanted to move away to my conscience but she was there.

Finally, when I was destroyed, they took me to a room. Two cold and rigid shadows, pretended to understand what was happening. They tried to make me feel calm, and they tried to convince me to return. But words were full of hipocrisy. They only wanted to wash their hands. I felt that.

Later, I went, listening music again. I only listened a song: Heart-Shaped glasses, of Marilyn Manson. It is curious, but it is the only thing that makes me feel calm as a sedative when I am at the limits of self-destruction.

On top of that, two of my Milan's friends are playing with fire. They have done a trip, and it is the second time that they told: "Next time I'm going to meeting you!" If you would want to go, you would have already gone.. Don't wait me to go to Milan, fuck off!

Concentrated in my dreams

I have started to looking how to make my dreams take shape, and realize them. I don't think already at time, but only at the objective (As the pacient buddists do) I have posed myself a lot of objectives to this year when it started, and actually, I'm working on it. I don't think to give up.

Maybe there are a couple of objectives which are more important than the others, the first of them is returning to Milan. Of course, In a hand, as I work,I'm saving money now. In the other hand, I'm looking for alternatives to evite passing for Madrid or Barcelona, and of course, there is an interesting alternative, which is taking a bus from Vigo to Oporto. There are regular lines of departure and return, which go from the bus station to the Oporto's airport. The only problem is that I would go from the bus station many hours first of the flight... At least, three of four, he, he.

The other big objective is the artistic development. It is something which is a little blocked now, specially because of the school and the exams that are starting soon (two of Chinese, four of English and five of Italian) but when classes finish, I will try to put myself into that absolutely.

Now, I just wait. I wait, but concentrated, to finish the school. I wait and dream.

Some photos

These are some photos (I have downloaded only the photos in where I am) when we were going to Toledo...

The rest of them are in the album of Sonia, as another times, hehehe.

I think that one of my friends from Milan is right... I have had a fisical change really spetacular...

How do you see me? :D

Sexuality

At my 21 years old and a half, is not difficult to realize that sexuality is a completely taboo subject, people looks to that with a strange perception yet, and don't think about it how is it like, a part of us, of our nature. We insist in hiding it in the deepest of us to evite critics, because we don't want the others to think about our unreasoning when we are supposed to be racional animals.

There is another thing that is curious as well, the most part of us are bisexual and we usually don't know it, we take a decission tendencially, but probably inconscius. It's not our blame, but is like that. There is people who thinks that is unnatural, e people who says that is an habitual behaviour, with apes too. And I don't believe they are implant these things.

Nowadays,there is who talk about the boom of the sexuality. There is not a fashion, the fact is that along more than forty years, at least here, they had to occult there ideas because of frieghtning to the reprisals...

I think there is only a thing represenhible, which is when somebody obblies to another person to do what he doesn't want, specially if is a weak and defenceless person. Everybody should be free without be critisized.

It is time to give up the label of whore for women, and the one of virile for men.

Is because of stress

Spring has been always unpleasant to me. I always feel tired in spring. Furthermore of been tired, I'm always stressed. The reasons of my stress are many, the work, classes, family, the insufficient inspiration and the fisical pain. I felt stressed because my emotions on past years, but now, I don't think much about that stupid things, because I have much to do. Is not only that, some things, as my thoughts about men an the relationship I have with them, have changed.

Yesterday I had to do the oral exposition of Italian. I have delayed it already once, and while I was doing it, I felt as I was diying... I did it about the celts in Italy. I felt so nervous, but anyway, my voice doesn't shaked, and my body neither (that's strange, in general, when I feel nervous, my hands shake and I laugh a lot) My partners told me that they hadn't noticed I was nervous.

This is my last Italian year. In a hand, I'm glad about that because maybe I would felt less stress, but in the other hand, it's a pity for me. Obviously, I don't feel like repeating course :D but, in the end, when you know you finish something, you know that some situations will be not repeated. In that 5 years of Italian, I have learned a lot of things. It took me in many ways I didn't have imagined first, and it gave me (And is giving me) mindblowing moments. It has changed all my history...

I think the worst thing anyway, haven't come yet: The last week on this month, I will have all my exams, around ten, So, I have to concentrate myself in it :D

Enemies

Everybody has enemies, people who complicates my life, or we feel bad, when everything is going well to them and not to us, simply. Nobody is free of people who walk on us, and who seem to do everything better and have more opportunities, or about who enviies and hurt us... or try it.

But at the same time, having enemies could be an incentive. An incentive to struggle, compete, to be better. Maybe having enemies is good, because it makes to exert ourselves, and make them value us... That can help to oneself.

So, next time you will see your enemies, don't think "I will walk on you". But only: "I will be better than you" and work to realize your dreams.

Cíes!! (12/4)

And here there are the photos of the Cíes... I have got fun, although it was cold and It had rained :D

In the photos, we are Salomé and me, Susana isn't in the photos because she made it most of them, another photos were taken by Salomé.

Stressful period

I'm in a stressful period of the year. In a hand, yesterday I felt so bad at job. They made me take callings, and I felt an useless person. Finally. they made me do what I had done first. I will take a dislike to the telephones, the programmes and Orange. Uff.
In the other hand, it is an stressful period at the school languages too. We have to talk for a minute in Chinese (I haven't done yet because I didn't have time to prepare it) and I have to do an oral exposition in ITalian. I think that it has to be a 10 minutes exposition. Anyway, I already know what to talk about: About Celts in Italy. Brugh and Iunthanaka have passed me a lot of information about the Celtic Milan. Milan, I miss you so much. I love you and I hate you, you are my dream and my nightmare, awful tears of happiness... But I will return, although I know that I will feel in a tense situation as when I went, or maybe more...

Dreams....

A few days ago, I have had a curious dream.



Yes, it was me. I had a blue suit that looks great. So formal. My hear was put up in a bun. My lips, were made up. And I had a black small case. (No, I haven't robbed a bank)



I run as a crazy woman into the Milan streets. I run, I looked at my watch. I was in a hurry. In a big hurry. I was late. I arrived to an underground stop, and I went downstairs as fast as I could. In that moment, I have lost the underground that I had to take. I wait patiently the next one. When I was into, I tried to be a little calm. I was late, but there was only a little to arrive. Finally, I went down and ran. I ran as never I have run. I arrived to a place that seems an office. I went into.


Too late. A group of men, were sitted in front a table, and they looked at me... Some of them smile me, and another had face of: Where have you been????Uff.....

La tarantella te pizzica

My meiga!

I had promised that I would publish the images of my meiga (witch) which I have done with model pasta...

And that's it!

Cultural week EOI (Chinese)

Senza commenti... Su quello di cinese sono quella che non è ferma nemmeno in minuto, si dondola, incroccia e disincroccia le braccia, ecc....

These are the posters that have appeared in Vigo to celebrate the women's day...



Without comments... Who knows me, knows that Matteo, Pelone and etc called me like that :D And when I was at Milan, I had to heard thinks like "Ciao Viga!" or "Ciao Vighina!" :D

Pizzica!

Thursday was the "big day". Yes, I have had to play with my tambourine a song of the south of Italy called "U Santu Paulu". Well, I start from the beginning. It has started when Fabio- my Italian teacher- proposed me to play the tambourine in the cultural festival. I have accepted without thinking too much. I have to say that the rehearses, were strange situations for me: The first day were only Fabio and Marco (another teacher)who have played too. They have played the guitar and the accordion. First we were in the Italian departament (with teachers who entered and went out a lot of times) but finally, we went the the acting room. I have to admit that they should lend me a hand (or two) to find the rithym of the song, and now, I think it seems to the Galician jota punteada :D

On Monday, we had to rehearse again, but rouunded by some Italian partners who wanted to improve dancing. This time were too the two dancers who came from Puglia (South of Italy) to teach dancing. It was an open rehearse to the Italian courses, so, we were rounded of teachers...(Uff...!) It was really as been in family to me, because I know most of the people, ha, ha, ha. Some people congratulated me because of how I was played or asked me how much time I have played the tambourine, that kind of things... Simona and Alessandro (the dancers)thanked me at least, three or four times because of my participation (That's not important, is something I have done with pleasure) Then I went out.

Next day, I had an e-mail from Fabio.He asked me where I had gone, because they all come for some drinks and I wasn't. Ha, ha, ha. It happens. It was anyway, a strange situation for me :D Well, I didn't really know, and I was so tired... It seems that Fabio have run behind of me, but I have run more than him :D That day, I went to drink something with them then of the rehearse, and I felt a little shy: Alessandro and Simona knew more about me than I thought, ha, ha,ha. (Don't trust never in an Italian teacher.. that's a expert advice!)

Finally, we had the act on Thursday. I was so nervous, but I enjoyed it. I think I have superated a kind of block There were a lot of people who congratulated me, and when I have risen, Marco told me to go to the Italian departament for a moment. He said me: "The coordinator had to do this... but he have gone...." He gave me a present. Yes, there was a present for me and another one for the other girl (That have gone too) of the Italian departament. It was a logical but good thing: a reading book :D

Finally, we went for some drikns, it came too another teacher and some of my pupils. Fabio told me that he will fail me in order to make me participate next year (Oh... That's horrible.. If I'm failed, I have to do another two years!) I enjoyed a lot myself, but then I felt a little sad... It had arived the end!!!

When I have arrived to my home and I told everything to my mother, she said me that:Cuando llegué a casa y le conté todo a mi madre, me dijo dos cosas:

- I should asked to my teachers to write me something into the book (I haven't think about that, really)
- that I should asked the e-mail to the dancers (I have thought about it, but I didn't do it, ha, ha, ha)

That's all. I hope to have photos or something in the future :D

Chinese in the cultural week

Yesterday was friday, so I had have to work, I haven't lessons, but I had the Chinese performance.

There were so many people that didn't come, in fact, we were only five or six people of my class, he, he, he. They put me in the front part, because I'm in tune (I'm not the only one in the class, anyway) I was a little nervous, my Italian teacher was there, but I knew that. That isn't the thing that makes me feel nervous at most. I think I started feel nervous when I saw that the... I don't know who you call it.. the person who is the coordinator of a school... (and he is my ex teacher of Italian too...!) Uff... And I haven't do the Italian performance yet, I have to practise, he, he, he.

Well, It wasn't bad, the only problem is that my legs shacked a little. When I have to do something like that and I'm nervous, I have the sensation that I lose my balance with the heels. I had grasped my hands in the back to evite more shake.:D I would like to improve to control my nerves when somebody looks me, but I think you only can improve it when... You do it a lot of times!

And now, pizzica

I have to do something I couldn't never imagine. Some weeks ago, My italian teacher told me to play a pizzica. I have acepted, but I'm a little toughtful,because I knew that the South Italian music in general is so fast.

So, yesterday I have gone to work and then, I let my bag at house, I took my backpack and my tambourine. I waited, and then, we have gone, first of all, to the Italian departament, and then, to the acting room. (With my Italian teacher and another Italian teacher... without comments!... Well, fortunately they had a good behaviour :D)

I need to practise a little to produce a sound similar to pizzica's sound. First of all, because they are two instruments a little bit different (Who knows about celtic music, maybe knows how galician tambourine is) So, I have to addapt the rythm. Puglia's tambourine is playing in a different way, they move the hand that they have free. In Galicia (In general, there are exceptions) people move the hand which has the tambourine. In Galicia are playing too big tambourines, but I don't have it and I think I couldn't play it at all :D





Left: Galician tambourine. Right: Puglia's tambourine :D



Anyway, now I have the cd and I have all the weekend (I didn't do theatre on Saturday because most of people are going to Madrid today)

There is something curious... I had found things in common between this type of music and the tradicional galician music: The dance, the dresses (In the cd there is a video too...!) the singing method is similar, and the lyrics are structured in a similar way too.

Anyway, I have looked a little about the pre-roman story of Puglia and I have found this:

"Between the VII and the IX, the region was attacked for the Longobardth (celtic popolation) francs and saracens, that ocupated the principal cities of the region, they let to Bisenzio only the Salento(with Otranto y Gallipoli).

Longobarth popolation occuped Gargano, Canosa, and Brindisi (633) Taranto, Bari, etc, while sacarens started to be sostituided by longobarths, till all the region were unificated in a only authority.

Only Bari, city that was seat of an emirate, with greece, longobarth, franc, and saracen popolations, and sometimes with the help of venetians (1002) he could have a little authonomy."

MAybe is that, who knows Galician music knows that is celtic, and that it is similar to Irish music :D

Work?

Today, after of been called and passing some tests, I have started a course for a job. It's a course of three days, but it is about an interesting topic, because it's about the joins and drops out from a telephone company to another.

It has been a lot of hours one then of another (And tomorrow, it will be more) but I'm happy. Nice partners, not difficult instructions (I think) and a busy morning. Then I supose we will do a practise month and finally they will decide if we continue or not.

Does it have consecuences? Well, it's probably that I couldn't go to the European Humanist Forum (4-6 april) So, I couldn't see Paolin, and I couldn't meet my friends or meet the musical groups I like... BUT in that case, I will be working, and earning money, so I could go with I have vacations, and I could stay more time :D

What a weekend!

This weekend I didn't stop!

Friday night I met Vane and some of her friends and I went out until the 5 AM. This time I didn't drink much alcohol, but I have danced a lot. First of all, we were in a Brasilian café and then we go out with some friends. I have danced as a crazy girl.

On sunday, I got up,- more or less, althought I arrived late- to the personal knowledge activity of Entrebarrios, because I know I have to learn to relax myself. It isn't bad. After that, at evening, we did some rehearsals of the theatre text, (We are performing for first time in a pub in a week) Then humanist meeting, after that I made up myself, (I dressed as a kind of witch) and many of us went to a party. I played the tambourine because two girls of the group are learning to dance Galician dancing, I have known a lot of nice people, we danced a lot, and we took as dinner an Ecuatorian reciepe. (It's the first time for me) One of the boys of the association told me later to go to a disco with him, but finally It couldn't be. Anyway, I got fun.

And today, well, I had a more relaxing day, although I went to Vane's house because he asked me to teach her a little English to talk with a Swiss friend (What a pitty... he is from the German zone!!!) And I was so nervous when I have started because I never did something like that... But anyway, little by little.....

I tell you that I hope going to Milan on April. It would be with the association, but it's a good thing to meet a special person... And to some another people. If I have good luck, maybe I can go to see some of the groups I like... I hope it!!! I wish to earn all the money by myself too and that anybody mess up my plan!

The songs of your life

There are songs which mark our lives forever. Songs that let an unforgettable trace of any shadow of our past, of or the present.

There is somebody who says that I felt ashamed of my native land, because I want to go. Who say that, maybe would remember what was the first step in my musical taste. The fist time I have listened something of music, which my parents of my uncles didn't induced to it. 10 years old. I was 10 years old when I started listening Heredeiros da Crus. I think that when my parents realized that I had no solution, he, he.

I was like that, at least, for three years (1997-2000). Then, as many times in my life, I had a period of "musical transition". In 2001, I starting playing tambourine. After that, the tears of tennage had me change stile absolutely. I listened The Police, and later, I listened Los Piratas, mixed with the first reggaeton songs of summer (2001-2003)

Later, I left this kind of music voluntary, lo leave my emotional sadness. Of course, I passed throutgh another radical change, and I started listening Marilyn Manson, to the last summer first of entering in the Languages School (2003-2004)I remember too that when I have entered in the Languages School I tried to understand a song called Giulia that I listened in the disco version of Gabry Ponte, but I didn't get understanding. I listened music connected to wicca too, and, when time passed, I started listening a little Italian music, It will be strange consecuences. During the 2005, - At this year I knew a boy who was virtually special for me- I listened Verdena and Afterhours besides of songs more malinconic. When this period finished, I cried with stupid songs of Tiziano Ferro and Povia...

But that period finished, as the others, and I started looking for alternatives, (As Nine Inch Nails) and then I started listened groups like GemBoy and Gli Atroci. I gave up listening the first group in May or June, because I felt transient anger. In addition in that period (April-May) I have started studying the Milan's language, so I have started listening some groups which sing in that language. The first group I listened was Gamba de Legn, but not the only one. In fact, now I'm into this kind of music, so, many groups. Facts (The travel, and some people that have helped me to improve it) make me listening the 90% of my time music in that language, with groups as, for instance, I Gufi (togheter and separated), Longobardeath, FBA, Davide Van de Sfroos, The Vad Vuc, Teka-P, Vomitiors, Enzo Janacci... - And now that's it, engaged in with Milan language. How many time I will pass like this?

And a question for you: What are the songs of your life?

Merry Christmas

I write you this post to wish you a Merry Christmas and a Happy new year 2008 full of surprises (Of good surprises, of course) Merry Christmas and Merry Yule :D

Two days ago I was a little sad, but I have recovered my smile. :D It's not strange, depressions are diagnosed on Christmas...

I have many objectives to 2008, So, I'm going to make a list. I make it almost all years, and I always achieve most of them. It's interesting to see the own evolution.

About the rest of things, I don't know what to say. What are you doing in these days? I think I will do the things I do all years, 24 th with my paternal family, 25 th with my maternal family. And then probably I will go out. I think I won't going out at 31 th, because I don't have yet the tickets. But then of three years living that experience, I have understood that sometimes is better to stay at home...

ill

Today is not one of my better days.

I'm ill. I'm not fine, I have pain of threat and eyes. Yesterday I had stomachache and headache too. I have not temperature, but anyway, I'm a virus with feet.

It annoy me! Why does it happen today? This mean that I'm not coming to theatre in two weeks! Next week if at most, I will go only to greet.. Today I can't go out. At any way, I have the pc to talk and write, books to read, letters to answer. I have something to do.

Happy.. but thoughtful

I'm thinking.

There are 13 days. 13 days of wait. Only 13. Then of these 13 I will finally understand what's the thing that heat my heart, that hug my mind and makes me cout all moments which I'm breathing.

I thank that then of my trip to Milan, or, my trip to the mind's confussion that the big metropolis have deffinitely decided about my heart, there wasn't solution. I was already a soul without destiny that saunder up and down thinking that he didn't exist. But exists. Exists and seems that he wants me.

In fact, it has appeared my ideal man. I don't know yet what It will happen. Two weeks yet... Today is a confusion's day too, anyway. A messagge of "happy bithday" sent from my mobile makes me remember that moment. The moment in that the "Viga" arrived to the big metropolis and was with some friends a little crazy. A message with answer that makes me remember. Makes me remember that they are there, and they didn't forget this friend that is a little crazy.

¡Thanks!

Thanks to everybody who remembered about my birthday yesterday :)

I'm old, I'm 21....

I will start...

Tomorrow everything starts again...

And the wheel rounds. Tomorrow I will go to Italian lessons, and Tuesday, to Chinese and English. I will see again the faces, of people that I value and ignore, I will start to fight against the letters...

There is people who had told me that I'm crazy: It's not enough with my mother tongues, (Spanish and Galician), with English, with Italian or with my criticized study of the Milan lenguage. (I will continue to fight about it) I will started Chinese.

If 10 years ago somebody told me about the things that are happening, I would not believe it.

And there are 10 days to become older: 21 years old. But it's the same, the hole important thing is to fight.. And not to wear myself out never!

Lost

Lost.

Lost again.

I am lost again in a sea of useless thoughts, of lost dreams, of endless fights to find a that person, Anahí, a middle-adult middle-child that already doesn't know how to face up to life, face up with a smile and all her strengh, (That is the thing I believe when I think in the moments I lived in a city that now is far) or with a tear, that falls too when I think in the reality of present. And I'm present and absent. Most of times absent. Because I'm not here. I wasn't never here. It's difficult to explain.

There are people who admires me. They admire me because of how I sing, of how I write, they admire my capacity of learning languages (Although I'm lazy) or to understand me with this f.. computers, although sometimes I become their slave. Well, about my artistically gifs, I only can tell something. Writing is not an ability. It's an illness. If yow want witing something good, you must to try it with your own stories and emotions, and sometimes are produced some strange sensations. Too strange. Sometimes almost suicidal.

Pics of Saturday

http://picasaweb.google.es/soniabuff/FotosCoruAActoConmemoraciNHiroshima

What a weekend!

This weekend I haven't been stopped a minute.

Friday: I have went out with Jenni, Toni, and a friend of Tony. We went for a drink, and then we went to a bar... I almost faint.

One of the ex colleagues of my father was singing in a bar... In one of these songs, she started to singing in front of me and when she had pieces of the song where she haven't to sing, she asked me for my life... ahahaha.

Yesterday was a great day. Mercedes came for me, (one of the humanists from here, from Vigo) Because we all went to meet to the humanists of A Coruña in a ceremony of the non-violence. I didn't stop doing things. (put the things, give out info, ecc) I got really tired. Anyway, I got funny. We arrived to Vigo at 3.00 AM! :D

Oooh mia bella Madonnina...

I wanted this song in this blog, as a dedicaton to the mornings, the afternoons, the evenings and the nights that I have lived, my smiles and my tears, specially my smiles, from the 28 of March and the 1 of April, and the 9 and the 11 of April.

I miss you, Milan... I have left you crying and with subjects to resolve,who know when I will see you again. I hope to see you soon, because you are hated but a lot of people, but I miss you. Now I cry and I get excited when I remember my euphoria but I will fight. For you, for everything I couldn't do yet, for everything I will do next time.


Madonnina


A disen: "La canzon la nass a Napoli",
e certament gh'hann minga tutt i tòrt,
Surriento, Margellina, tutt i pòpoli
i avrann cantaa almen on milion de vòlt.
Mi speri che se offendarà nissun
se parlom on ciccin anca de numm.

O mia bella Madonnina, che te brillet de lontan
tutta dòra e piscinina, Ti te dòminet Milan
sòtta Ti se viv la vita, se sta mai coj man in man.
Canten tucc: "Lontan de Napoli se moeur",
ma poeu vegnen chi a Milan!

Adess gh'è la canzon de Ròma magica
de Nina, el Cupolone, el Rugantin.
Se sbatten in del Tever: "Ròma tragica!"
Esageren, me par, on ciccinin...
Sperem che vegna minga la mania
de mettess a cantà: "Malano mia!"...

O mia bella Madonnina ...
Sì, vegnì senza paura,
numm ve slongarem la man:
tutt el mond l'è on gran paes
- e semm d'accord! -
ma Milan l'è on gran Milan!

Ouf!

Hi to everybody :)

Today I'm a little tired. Because yesterday I went out to the 6.30 in the morning with Vanessa and another people. I have drank something, a strawberry caipiroska. Then, we went out to another places. We went into three different discos and all of them were absolutely full of people!!!

First of all, I waited for Vane in a place that we had said. But I haven't seen her for a long time.. I was waiting and I have read some messages of one person when I was in Italy, and I felt a little melancholic. A tear falled when I was remembering that I got a lot of fun in Milan (without comments) and remembering that person.

We went to some discos. Exactly into three. The worst thing is that: Every discos were full of people. How is possible? Here in Vigo? In June? Nobody takes holydays in this city?

I got fun, but finally I was really tired. I hadn't going out at night for a long time!

Some minutes ago, I tried to charge my Italian card because it didn't have much money... And I could do it! I am happy. I need to use it, he, he, he.

Forgotten dreams

Today I dreamt with Jose, a boy that I liked when I was 15.

He was an school partner and, First of all, I got on well with him, the problem was when he discovered that I liked him. I was crazy avout him to the 17. Nowadays, I have supered this, although my emotional situation is always unsteady, he, he, he.

Musical Experiment

I could never imagine the thing I have done now.

I was listening a song of the Modena City Ramblers, an Italian group who makes celtic music, they are inspired by the Irish music, and sing in Italian and in Modena dialect.

Well, I was listening one of their songs,"La Fiola Dal Paisan", And I don't know why... Suddenly, I have taken my tambourine. I take easily the rithim of the song. And I have playing with my tambourine while I sang a part in Italian, and a part in Modena dialect.

I haven `t been making experiments for a long time...

It's an advantage...

It's an advantage that I didn't listen musical groups really known. Then, if you write them, they answer :P

And it hasn't finished yet...

I found the video of "Qué jallo é" too (1994, I probably was 7 or 8 years old ) When I was a child, the truth is that I was afraid of them...

yesterday what it happened to me is that, then of watching it, I couldn't avoid to be moved and cry... Not by sadness, but by happyness and melancholy...

Íscalle Lura

What a memory... That video was my initation to rock.. 10 years ago! Who could imagine it?

Reflection

Time goes fast when you notice that one year is like another; the same school periods, holidays periods, cellebrations, weekends, mornings, afternoons, evenings.

Heredeiros da Crus... returns?

I had read a new that have surprised me a lot, published at the virtual newspaper of "La voz de Galicia" at the 16th Febrary.

It tells that Javi Maneiro, singer of Heredeiros da Crus, ( The first musical group important in my life) have said that the group will get toghether to think at the possibility of play togheter again.

It's a good new, but full of questions for me... Some of the members are working in another musical projects. Could be true?

I will inform you

Men...

I have a big mix-up in my mind..

I have a lot of men in my mind... And I don0t know if I'm important to someone...

Probably I'm not nothing to some of then. Or an admirer. Or a friend. But no-one will dream with me...

I'm listening a song that predicts the tragedy...

Subliminal advertising in an American cooking show

In USA, has born a really big polemic because of this video.

It's an American TV programme (Iron Chef America) where you can see that there are subliminal messages from Mc Donald's.

What a night

Hi to everybody:

I'm here, then of a going-out night (A really disgusting one, of course) The first thing that made me angry is that Begoña came with us (But it's worst to her, if I am her, if never will going out with us)

This night was really horrible. First we went to a disco, that was full, they made pay to my friends and they didn't make us enter. He must to call the police. They went fast. They were, I think, five local and two national police-officer. The whole thing is that the national police wasn't neccesary, when they saw that police was there, they give us the money (or a part of the money)

Finally, we went to another place. I didn't want drink but I must to, because if you don't pay for a drink you can't go out. I drank a licqueur 43 with chocolat drink (I hate beer) I arrived at 6 at home... and my mother was angry because of the hour, I don't understand why, sometimes I have arrived at 7, sometimes at 9, and she never said me something...

About art

A human is who knows how to make you cry. An artist is who knows how to make you laugh.

Bad weekend

This weekend wasn't the best:

- Fights at Friday night
- Melancholy at Saturday night
- Wishes of realize an impossible dream
- Jelousy at Sunday.

Happy 2007

Good morning to everybody (Well, it's 14.12, but I've just get up!) Evening has gone well, I took a good dinner in my grandparent's house, and then I went to Etnias. I drink some malibu with pineapple, I had some boy behind me, and I danced without control.

Now I have to going to past to take stock of this last year. It hasn't gone bad, although there were some bad things. The year 2006 it didn't have started well, with my emotions out of control (Now I'm a little bit calm) I wanted to solve with Marco in that moment, and the true is that now I wouldn't want to solve anything. Did he earn my tears? I don't know, the whole thing is that now I'm as free as the wind and I'm proud about, I take a good use of my time ;). I admit that this year, I had a lot of men in my mind. I had my emotions really out of control.


Artistically, I can't complain: My evolution is positive, and sometimes I have oportunities. For example, I have participated in a poetry book in Italian. About my musical taste, if somebody say me: "Tell me about the musical group you have listened most of the time this year" The answer is obvious. Gem Boy! And if somebody dislikes it, can get f*****.

I had good luck too about religion, I found a lot of wiccans this year. And not only that, I knew a lot of people for going out and talking :D.

I started this year with a lot of dreams and hopes, without hurry, but without breaks. I want to progress with my artistic evolution, getting on well with my studies, losing a little sense of shame, and making some things more difficult to do, but not impossible...

Happy 2007 to everybody!

Proposal

Some people have proposed this:

Make versions of the blog in Chinese and Galician too. (Well, with Chinese probably I'll need a little help, because the Chinese I know is really basic but I wouldn't have problems)

That decision depends of the opinion you have...

What do you think?

Merry Christmas

I'll say it in the languages that I can: (Without juggles)

Merry Christmas (English)
Feliz Navidad (Español)
Bó Nadal (Galego)
Buon Natale (Italiano)
Feliz Natal (Português)
Fröhliche Weihnachten (Deustch)
Sheng Tan Kuai Loh (Zong Wen)

Week without internet

Hi to everybody, that 5 days I was almost everytime disconnected, only I had seen the mails (to avoid the saturation...) I felt good, and I realized my objective: To finish to read Italiani si diventa I was concentrated in my homework.

Then, in my free time, I was listening music, most of the time, Gli Atroci I Gem Boy Babaman and Morodo . Obviously Gli Atroci and I Gem Boy were useful when I wasn't well, to laugh a little, and to charge me with a lot of... energy! (boooom!) and about, Babaman and Morodo (The only Spanish group I have listened in this period) to get relax. I ask me what could think my parents when I turned on music of Gli Atroci or Gem Boy. ( It's better not to think about) (Now I'm listening with my aural of the ears,Gli Atroci not to listen the thing that my mother is listening, that sicks me, (Luis Miguel) I have to say too, that when yesterday I was waiting to enter to my English class, I was singing Canzone del cazzo and I didn't mind if people listened to me... I ask me for the effect if I would sing it first of enter to my Italian class... (I hope that teachers never will listen me singing a GB's song... What would they say???)

I had wrote a lot, (another objective) I had write a letter for Milan too (I ask me how many time needs to arrive to Italy....) I started to write a story too about a Spanish man who goes to know an Italian girl who has the half age... I feel inspirated for tue moment (Whithout comments!) And I have concentred in religion too.

I had take some coffee with some partner. That's a direct message to people who say that I'm not sociable. I'm knowing a lot of people. If today I pass the final test vs. my shyness, I will can to pass everything :D

Shyness...

Today somebody gives me a good advice about shyness. He said me I should let me go for the sensations, without be afraid, breath with depth and throw... without think!

The most difficult thing will be to do it!

I feel full.

Hi to everybody:

At this period I feel full because of many reasons. I feel good, it seems that all my dreams started to be real.

People say that there are three things in the life: Healthy, money and love. I don't really agree. Healthy is important, of course, it is a basic mainstay of a happy person. Money, it depends of the level. We have to be agree with the money that we have. And love... Well, love is important but not essential. Is more important to have people near to you when the boat starts to sink.

In fact, one of the better things that I started to live is that I'm knowing a lot of people, for example, school partners, or people who share my religion believes...

Is an important thing too, that artistic, I'm started to feel more realized, more important to people... I don't know. I start to find more oportunities. Is one of the more important things for me, to be valued for people artistically.

At last, about my emotional life, there's not a certain thing, but I see more clearly everything.There are things to make clear and battles to fight, and I don't know what will be the finish. But I have hopes.

A little about everything

Hi to everybody!

Today, Although there's a sad new about yersterday that I wont say, it was a beautiful, happy day and full of news...

Raf have maken a description in his blog with a lot of fiability, although he did it in Italian, obviously.

Yesterday morning I recieved an email of a music group who is looking for a female singer... The problem is that I would have to go to Pontevedra.. Although if everything goes all right, I'll look for a person to go. Then I went to the library to take the first Italian book for reading.

I made teathre in Italian and somebody had to write an argument on the phone, at her home. Then we had to play it. I made a lot of stress, and my teacher said... "You had a lot of discussions, didn't you?" And I answer: "Yes, and a most of this with Italian people!" (Worst and unpolite too)

Then, I had Italian lesson. At lesson, Ele and me, laugh a lot because she taked a book about the state of my "virtual ex", Abruzzo, and that book talk a lot about dialects and that things.. We laughed trying reading and understanding the dialect of two boys who made jokes... (I discoverd I understand more than in that moment)

When the lesson had finised, I asked to my teacher the book that he writed and he writes: "For Anahí, from writer to writer. With simpathy, Fabio". Beautiful! Then he told me that he read me in a site on internet where I published something. I couldn't imagine!

Later, Elena and me, went for a walk while we waited for Patry, a childhood friend, who studies there too, and lives near to Elena. For this reason, they leave togheter.

About the autumn.

The autumn is my favourite season.

People say that is the favourite season of artists. Would be true?

I don't be uncertain about this...

A change...

First





Then

Biography

I had make a biography in English some days ago. I had a lot of mistakes. Now I write to you the biography I did:

Anne Pink-Cat

Anne Pink-Cat was an important celtic priestess. She was born in Ireland, at the IV B.C. She lived in the base of a mountain with her people, and she was called Anne because of the Goddess Anu, Pink because her mother was a defender of love, and Cat because she seemed like one.

When she was a child, se was nominated by the ancient priestess as the new priestess, and she spent most of time with the last priestess, learning the misteries and traditions about magic and religion. She did a lot of magic works of love and fertility, generally created by herself, during her life.

She had two daughters and she adopted a boy because her mother died when he was born. This fact was an important one for her, and she decided to look after that boy as a son.

When she was 20, she organized and managed her first Samhain, the most important celtic celebration. On this day, the celtic year finished. Nowadays, that celebration is the origin of Halloween.
At the age of 25, she received a Big Gold Cauldron out of gratitude for her work and attitude.

When she was 30, she and her people arrived in Scotland. There, she met Brigit Stone-Glance, who was another celtic priestess of the zone. They had a fight, but after discovering about their commmon culture, they decided to work and travel togheter for a time. Then, five years later, the other group get his way.

She lived in Scotland for 15 years, where she fell in love with Allore Fast-Tiger, a warrior of a celtic popolation. They decided to get married two years later, and they lived togheter with her son and daughters. Then, she became a spiritual teacher for little children.
When she was old, she became a quack doctor and looked after her grandchild. She nominated her heiress to teach her about religion and magic.
She died at the age of 65 in Scotland.

It rains.

Hi to everybody:

And I'm there then of going for a walk under the rain. I said to my father that I went for a walk and I have went out of my house. When I was at the middle of Calvario, it started to rain a lot. and not only that, it started to thunder. I have to recognised that I feel great, with the rain that falling on me, I felt as a prehistoric one. (Appart of this, old people always make stupid comments) I advise to everybody who have a good healthy to make this.

When I have returned to my house, I get out my colthes, I dried my hair and I get on my piyama. My shoes and my jeans were really dreanched.

My musical taste

Hi to everybody, A greeting from my refuge that is always my blog, while I listen Samael, for the people who doesn't know, it's a great rock group. And now I wish to listen it.


And now I wish talk about my musical taste too, because is always a little surprising. My favorite style is rock. I'm always convincing person. If I didn't have rock music, although I would have oxygen and water, but I would die. I didin't listen only rock, but I listen rock variants too. Sometimes I listen heavy or punk, but there is a clear thing: When I'm sad, it's only advisable listen rock.

I listen pop, but a little. In fact, is a musical style too much commercial, sometimes is junk. I don't listen Rap and Hip-Hop in general. Probably a few songs, but if I listen too much about this, I get full. I listen Reggae and ragamuffin. I only listen reggaeton and electronic music at disco, I almost listen that styles at home. And obviusly, I listen music for wiccans, what is very often New age. I couldn't know to say anymore about my music style, but if you want to know, you only have to ask :D .

I'm awful

Hi to everybody,

I'm awful from yesderday.

That's the second time, the plans go to hell again. I feel powerless seeing as everything is out of control, and I can't do nothing to get a solution for my problems.

Emocionally, I'm worst everyday, It couldn't be another way.

Is not right...Everything is going bad and now I'm destroied.

Today is 7 th November

Today is 7th November.

Today, just one year ago, I was destroied. My red eyes, full of tears, couldn't stop crying. I thank: " I'll never return to be happy" I didn't find sense to something, and I thank the world finished. Just one year later, everything is different.

The Anahí of today is different. She doesn't feel bitterness to the causing of the tears, because I wasn't exactly the true causing. The Anahí of today, look to life more positively her life and look her whishes closer. She is calm. She's happy of to be absolutely single. She dances, sings, writes, laughs, goes out with friends. She get progress in the school. She is happy.

What a day!

Yesterday, when there was only a few minutes to go to Italian lesson, I went to buy some instant creams (soups). Then I went out, I went to a supermarket ( and I thank to go to another further) I return to my house, I leave the bag, I take My school things and I go fast! When I'm arriving, two Watch Tower's members I said I'm not interested, I ran to the languages school, and rised the three floors on foot...

And finally, the teacher didn't have arrive!! ha ha ha ha!

Alone at home

This week-end I stay alone at home. If I don¡t going out, I'll die!