Deep loneliness

State: Sad
Song: Counting Crows: Colorblind

Loneliness.

Deep loneliness.

I feel blocked in a tunnl, the angy has exploted, the research of my inner peace has been impulsed.

Merry Samhain to everybody.

Courage

State: A little bit tired
Song: Los Piratas- La sal

I have been to Italy for two months. Fortunately, I'm back to Milan again (alwayas as an a pair) If I couldn't return to Milan again, I would get crazy. I can't stand the little villages. I'm a city woman. I prefer to feel under my feet that the road shaking because of the underground,instead of hearing no noise at nights. It makes me feel alive.Apart from that, some situations make me prefer always Milan.

Unfortunately, it is not all right. Some people are not really well. Some people because I'm far. Another people, although I'm close to them, they have really big problems.

Each second is important... I haven't realise of it at first.

Some people think that to do what I did (going abroad, without nothing for sure and with the risk of losing everything) is for courageous people. Maybe is not for courageous people, but it is for crazy people. For coward people. I needed to go. Not many people suffrered, but the people who suffered, they suffered a lot. Not many people realise that I have arrived, neither. But I didn't go unnoticed for some people.

Some things that are happening around me are too hard for me, but I have to be strong.

The face of happiness...

I'm in love...

Michael Jackson

I hadn't had time to write something before.

It's really a pity the death of Michael Jackson, he has been a great artist. It's also a same his continous fisical changes (unnecesary changes, first of them he was really handsome) and that some rumors have damaged his image.

R.I.P.

Nerves

Status: Thoughful
Song: Gamba de Legn- Ciapasala no

Hi everyone, I have decided to write again, I have only the English exams, on Monday and Thursday, but now I have much more time because I don't have lessons. The Chinese exams have gone ok, although the day of the oral exam I met the director of studies (who is a little bit teasing, and as I said sometimes, he taught me...) And he asked me if I was making such a racket upstairs (Oh, of course, you ask it to somebody who is really quiet...:D)

During this days I felt a little sad because I don't know anything about the job. I tried to call and... no answer. And there is a month to go. Obviously, this fact upset me. To tell the truth, I was starting to think in staying at home, but I realised that I absolutely have to go. Whatever happens. Deep down, the most seriously thing that could happen is to have the need of going to the Spanish consulate and ask for a return ticket, But I hope not to reach that limit...

Nevertheless, during last weeks I have had a kind of virtual love at first sight with a boy from Milan, the strangest thing is that it seems to be mutual.... He has impressed myself a lot really, and it seems that I impressed him too. By the way, independiently of this, he looks surprised because he says I look really involved with politics... To tell the truth I have been interested in that for some years... My ideas had been always more or less the same... More or less. The most curious thing is that regarding Italy, some people really convinced of their ideas have done that I could know some people (virtually at last) of the politics world. Some majors, dipolomate ranks and candidates. o_O

At least, I has been called from the ONCE for a Braille course. They really have the obbligation of organize courses, but there are not many volonteers at Vigo, so they organise this course sometimes :D

Sorry...

Status: stressed
Song: Vacca- Poco poco poco

I'm sorry because I'm not writing much in this period, but I'm really stressed because the exams and the trip... (But overall, I'm paranoic)

I want that this period will pass soon...

Shit

State: depress
Song: Pesi Piuma- Giorni di Sangue

Today I'm not fine. Menstrual, angry because my brothers have travelled for first time (to Paris) and I had gone to any place out of Galicia. They have just only 15 years old, and they have been to Madrid, to Barcelona, and now to Paris.

I don't have clear ideas either about my return to Italy, it could be a big victory or a spectacular failure. In these days I have no news about the job, they have to send me a document to sign yet... About "where to sleep" I don't have either anything clear, I'm thinking about some possibilities, but I don't know anything for sure.

Today is the tipical shit day in which I only want to cry and eat. In this period I don't go out, everybody are busy... I don't know. I'm not fine. And in a short period of time, I will have exams...

I'm not sure about my future... Absolutely not..